#I'm gonna try to get a preview posted sometime this week but I have to work for the next five days so can't make any promises.....

[meownotgood]

I wanted to get much further than I actually did today, but this is still good

[what0smart]

Jay and Jon: Absolute Power

Been a while since I posted but I wanted to make a post as a sort of quick refresher for what we know about Absolute Power and what it's gonna be like for Jay and Jon. (Some of this will be more speculation as some of it is not 100% confirmed but the majority of this is accurate based on what we've seen.) Spoilers Ahead!!!

Amanda Takes Control of Gamorra

In Suicide Squad:Dream Team we follow Nia as she struggles to fight against Amanda as she is forced to help in a hostile take over of Jay's country, I'll get back to Nia's role in this soon. In Issue 2 of Dream Team Bizarro acts on Amanda's orders and ends up killing Jay's mother, but right before that Jay is telling her that he's trying to call Jon for help but he's not picking up his phone.

For a while we were unsure if something had happened to Jon or if he just wasn't near his phone which many, including myself, doubted because of Jon's super hearing and how attentive he is as a boyfriend, but now we know why he didn't answer the phone.

Jon was Missing

For a long period Jon was just nowhere to be seen in the comics, even in a Brainiac event focused on the entire Kent family. In that event Clark mentions that Jon is with the Titans, but the next week we saw that he was not with them despite both comics taking place at nearly the same time. It didn't feel like they just didn't have room for Jon in the story but more that he was intentionally not present. We now know that it's because he has been kidnapped by Brainiac, as we now have the covers for Jon's solo issue in Absolute power "Superson". It seems like Amanda had gone after Jon first before going after the Nakamura's knowing that Jon would intervene unless stopped beforehand. There’s a chance that this could be wrong and we won’t know until after the event releases but until then this is the working theory.

Nia's Betrayal

In Issue 4 of Dream Team we end up seeing why Nia hasn't stopped Amanda despite her opportunities, it's because Nia's parents are under threat if Nia steps out of line.

While her actions are understandable she did just chose her own parents over Jay's mother and his country and that choice is going to cause a strong divide between the two of them. If you're more interested in this Nicole Maines, the creator of Nia and one of the writers for Absolute Power recently had an interview going over how Jay, Jon, and Nia's relationships are going to have massive changes throughout this story.

We're going to start with this spike in Nia and Jay's relationship as previews for Absolute Power #1 show that Nia is tasked with Deadshot in capturing Jay so he doesn't use his platform on Truth and Amanda keep's control of the narrative.

Final thoughts

I am personally very excited for this event, at it's base I'm glad to get an event which feels like if the heroes win could be a conclusion to Amanda Waller for quite sometime if not permanently. This is a very unique story and it's exactly what I've been hoping for Jon to get conflict wise of putting him in a position where he feels powerless, it's also going to dive into his past which is always nice to see finally happen for Jon. Jon's event appearances in my opinion are consistently pretty good in things like Dark Crisis and Beast world so I'm really happy he's a main character. It's nice to see Jay being involved in a major conflict in a way his addition feels very natural with references back to Son Of Kal-El and will have lastly impacts on him as a character, especially for Jay's first event appearance. We haven't seen much of Nia's friendship with them so it's nice to have more at the for front now rather than in the background, even if it is kind of their friendship falling apart. This is also Nia's first real time in the spotlight starting out with Dream Team and leading into this, which I have very much enjoyed so far, Nicole is not afraid to put Nia in really tough spots or give her flaws which I appreciate. This event has some of my favorite writers on it like Mark Waid so I'm expected good things and I hope you all who read this enjoy it too.

Edit

I had to make some corrections and you can find those here

As well as now that the issue released you can read the update to this post here

[raccoonfallsharder]

here are a few sneak previews of what we’ve got going on (this is really more to organize my thoughts and force myself to come up with titles than anything else)

upcoming rocket raccoon fics behind the cut

1. Window Across the Galaxy

aka long&angsty. hoping to start posting on Sunday or Monday.

Slooowww burn + eventual smut. elements of hurt/comfort because rocket is the saddest-angriest boy. Slight AU starting pre-GOTG volume 1 (but will hit most of the same major plot points).

Rocket is captured by a Ravager crew hoping to get rich off the excessively large bounty on his head. Throwing a wrench in everyone’s plans is the Terran girl they hired to do some freelance assessing on a recent haul of goods they’ve seized from a Xandaran luxury liner. Oops.

She looks at the rusted bars, and back to her brute of a tour guide, and sighs heavily. Slowly, she turns back to the cage, swaying toward the bars so she can peer in at eye-level. She’s immediately face-to-face with the creature. His ears are still pressed flat against his head, fur bristling, and he’s gazing back, clearly suspicious and probably - justifiably - feeling more than a little bit mean. She’s suddenly certain that if she got close enough, he’d take out her eyes. There’s no helping herself, is there? One corner of her mouth twists up in exhausted resignation and she nods. “Welp,” she says solemnly to the raccoon, “fuck me, my dude.”

2. Blackmail Material

(codename: pwp???). will probably post part 1 in a week or two.

just pure fucking smut. this was gonna be two parts but I'm leaning toward three now (smut // fuff // smut). probably takes place sometime after endgame but before volume 3? not that it really matters tbh because there is NO FUCKIN PLOT HERE. ur girl's got a praise kink so that'll definitely be featured per usual.

basically: rocket finds your vibrator.

“I’ll tell you what,” he offers up, still grinning that shit-eating grin. “I won’t say a word and I’ll give it back to you. You can even keep whatever batteries are in it.” That sounds too good to be true. You raise a brow and cross your arms in front of your breasts. “If?" “If you let me watch you use it,” he challenges, eyes daring you. “For science.”

3. Domestic Scenes in Space Travel

(codename: ok sweatshirt girl.) i dunno -maybe post the first one by mid-august?

Comics-inspired but not exclusive - just a buncha feel-good fuffy one-shots and equally feel-good smutty one-shots. Series of slice-of-life readerxrocket one-shots following The Very Boring Adventures of Space Pilot & Sweatshirt Girl.

“Just try not to push any buttons or pull any levers till you know what they do.” You snort. “I fully intend to keep my hands completely to myself unless I have your explicit permission to touch.” Rocket leers. “That could be fun.” Your eyes narrow. “Space Pilot, I’m gonna need you to focus on the task at hand so I don’t end up accidentally jettisoning us.”

4. Other Duties As Assigned

(codename: schemers, dreamers, & multicalendar memers) i don't have an intended outcome for this fic yet so while i am VERY much enjoying it, i first need to grapple with whether or not i'm okay posting something that may be unfinished. i usually try to avoid that.

I have no idea whether this will get smutty or not (probably, knowing me?). Begins five months after The Snap.

Natasha Romanoff is an administrative nightmare - a fact that does not go unnoticed by the (interim) captain of the Milano. First she demands that the remaining two Guardians of the Galaxy be reachable via a primitive Terran messaging system, and then she can't be bothered to read the frickin' emails.

Thank fuck she's hired a new assistant.

**THIS MESSAGE IS ENCRYPTED** To: <nromanoff@aee.org> From: &lt;rocket@aee.org> Subj: re: WHAT THE FUCK RED Date: Monday, September 24, 2018 7:34am well that’s probably the nicest message I’ve gotten since I hacked the internet I’m gonna have to kill your boss though

(a super-secret spoiler sidenote - i have a formula and I shamelessly overuse it, so there are no surprises here: girl falls first, raccoons falls harder. every fuckin time friends.)

[feuqueerfire]

Wandee Goodday Ep 7 Live Blogging

Whoop whoop 2nd week in a row that I'm managing to watch the show right after it airs. Although I did consider not watching it for 1-2 days so that I can finish my binge watch of Unknown (I'm so excited to see petty Yuan in ep 8 heh) but thought I should just watch this one before I find out everything that happens through tumblr and twitter posts.

I'm in sort of an angsty mood, esp after the last few Unknown eps that I've watched, so I'm expecting some angst here too. Eps 5-6 of Wandee have been happy and fun while they ignore their feelings and problems, so I need some of that to burst and cause issues.

Ep 7 (June 15)

7-1

showing a little support for psychiatry, though idk how helpful it is to make somebody go when they don't really wanna go

Does Yak want a mouth kiss if he wins?

Yak finds a photo of Ter and Dee in a book and it casts doubt in his mind ig

ohhh Dee was planning on throwing it out but in the end kept it and he had even written "love Dr. Ter the most" on the back

pls Kao's frustration as the audience stand-in

"...might lead to losing them"

Did Ter hear the part that gives away that they're not real bfs

well, he knows they're not dating fr anyway but still the audacity to confront Yak like this

Ter using his knowledge about Dee gained for the past 8 years against Yak, agh. like you knew him all this time and must have known he liked you and yet now that he's finally moving on, you can somehow take action? piss off

both Unknown and Wandee have boxing

what is up with these grown ass adults not being able to live without seeing each other for a few days T.T you shouldn't even be thinking of not going to Japan bc you won't see Yak for a couple days

Why is Dee basically he sniffing Yak's armpit in the gym showers

7-2

Yei just watching Yak sneak out lmfao

fuck I think Ter's gonna somehow be here? I didn't watch the preview but I saw a screencap of Ter and Dee while Dee was in the tiger outfit or whatever, though I think somebody mentioned it was at Ter's place

speak of the devil...

oh, Yak's got a keycard to Dee's place, did we know that?

why is Dee at Ter's bruh

let's fucking kill Ter, I actually cannot anymore

I do think it's funny how neither of them are commenting on Dee's literal tiger sex roleplay costume lmao he's even got a headband!

Dee needs to snap out of it, get up, and leeeeeaaaave

now Kao is here too?

the costume isn't for you to appreciate, Ter stoppppp >:((((

why the fuckkkk did Ter start leaning in, I actually need this man dead and gone, get off my damn screen

and then spilling wine on himself and wanting Dee to help cleanup and now he's practically naked in his fucking boxers, I wish I could be normal about just disliking Ter but I am immature about my hatred for him the same way he's immature about his ways trying to get Dee

TER IS OPENING THE DOOR IN HIS BOXERS?!?!? AND DEE'S ALSO IN HIS TIGER COSTUME IM GONNA LOSE MY SHIT AGHHH

[Linguistics] oh damn Yak uses meung with Ter in anger

aw man T.T I get Yak, why did Dee say Yak always uses violence? I don't recall Yak being violent before this???

Yak breaking up, returning the keycard, taking the necklace back, ouchhhhhhhhh

Yak leaning on Taem

Aw man, Dee being sad at the necklace being gone

I think I would like it if for the rest of the ep + some of next ep, they're separate about doing their own stuff and missing each other and spending time with Ter & Taem only to realize they don't feel the same as they used to and when they come together again (hopefully sometimes next ep, I don't want it to be solved this ep tbh), it's with real feelings and confession. I think I also want Dee to confess/start the conversation since he's the one who fucked up (I know I ragged on Ter but how did Dee even let it go through all those steps omg)

fuck I saw 1 second of the preview and aghhhh I hate Ter, who could've guessed. I have some stuff to do so I'll be back for the next 2 parts later, though they're quite short compared to the first two parts.

7-3

back to watching but I'm having lunch so I probably won't type much

T.T

Ter realized his feelings alright. i don't know that i believe you lol, though maybe it's true since Ter's drunk while he's saying it

okay Ter accidentally fell, I thought he was gonna attack Dee from the 0.2 sec preview

dang, Yak's the one who leaned back and didn't kiss Taem. It seems like Taem wouldn't have been opposed to it?? Did she fall for him some time in the past few eps

7-4

oops was checking at the bottom timing bar how many minutes the show actually is before previews start (9mins) but got spoiled for the last scene of the ep

Damn, Yak's imagination of Dee and TEr really has him facing a humiliating defeat against Luke's character

I get P'Yei like despite everything going on in Yak's life, this is still his job and him winning was necessary for himself, the gym, money, etc. or at least put up a fair fight, not whatever that was bc of a fight with his fwb-fake bf that he has real feelings for

Aw, Wandee came back immediately and found Yak at his favourite place or whatever

Yak crying nooo

why am I suddenly paranoid that this is also Yak's imagination lmao

ah, indeed Yak had asked for Dee's first kiss

and Dee kisses him even though he lost

the kisses are mid but it's fine

damn, a hospital ball next ep? and how is Ter even in the show still wtf

I wanted angst and sadness and I got that but the way we got there was fairly contrived. Ter's sliminess I understand but Dee going through so many steps without just... leaving is like ?? I get that he may still have feelings for Ter that makes him not think straight or whatever but c'mon... am I supposed to believe Dee would actually go to Ter's place and have dinner there in his fucking sex roleplay clothes that he put on to have a candlelit dinner with Yak? and the violence comment was like... no? Yak's pathetic fight was also like... why.

The first kiss was also not impactful because we've established for 7 episodes that it's something very monumental to Dee + it's something that he wants to do with only somebody he really likes, so to have it 1) be a "consolation prize" and 2) come before they discuss their feelings or anything is resolved feels incomplete. It's not a grand or romantic moment the way their first kiss should have been. I don't wanna go back to goofy dance show or whatever next ep...

idk, this ep was a bit of disappointment in terms of storytelling and the way we're exploring emotions, I hope they can turn it around. They have 5 more episodes and so theoretically they have time to do stuff well but also... they have time to drag everything out lol

The necklace though T.T

[nokingsonlyfooles]

There. I Fixed It.

Kinda. Every instalment has been reformatted, although I haven't been over all of them so I've probably made a few errors which I'll catch over the next few weeks. Milo's cards seem to be displaying well across devices. The front page seems to function, as does Tin Soldier's new, incomplete, spoiler-lite sub page.

The menus and basic navigation, however, are fucked. The new interface is coding menus in a new way and I haven't tackled it yet. I got more doctor stuff today, so I'm taking a slight break to stress over that instead. Nevertheless, when I do get to the menus, there's a non-zero chance they'll break everything again.

There is no way for me to do this except breaking the site live. The backend does not preview correctly, or sometimes at all. There have been multiple violations of WYSIWYG, which I don't have the energy to explain. I got something that seems to work, but it's not how I wanted it. There are a lot of work-arounds for shit that's just broken.

And regarding Patreon's foot-dragging, privacy-violation in-progress: I finally got the email that SAYS they're deleting my information, but they haven't yet. It's all still there. It's been a couple days now. I'll hafta try clearing my cache and see if that does anything, but it hasn't been caching my site like that as I repair it, so I'm pretty sure the info really is still there.

My few supporters, this is no picnic for your privacy either, as I could reactivate my page and start charging you again as long as it's still there - if I were a bad person. I'm not gonna, but this makes me very reluctant to use Patreon again, even to support others. If I wind up paying money to another scammer, they could prevent me from cancelling my subscription by taking their page down and putting it back up - as, indeed, James Somerton has been doing.

I am ready to get set up with Ko-Fi, but I'm not doing anything until Patreon does what it promised. And I will not start charging anyone for anything until I start posting more instalments.

For the future, though, I have decided I want a million dollars. Canadian! CAD is fine! I'm not feeling enough incentive to keep screwing around with the broke-ass site editor, so I'm telling myself someone, or a lot of people, will eventually give me a million dollars, and then I'll be able to afford housing in the Lower Mainland, and grow me some tomatoes in the backyard. I probably don't really want that, but it's keeping me going for now.

[changbinslovelylegs]

It gets worse before it gets better - Felix part 1

Pairing: no specific pairing right now

WC: will always be between 2k-4k words

Warnings: Language, throwing up, talk of past trauma, gyno visit, needles

Not sure if I was gonna post this yet but I decided to fuck it, updates plan to be once a week but if I miss a week don't kill me writing is hard and sometimes I can't be bothered. Anyways enjoy chapter 1 cya next week!

Preview, description, characters here

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Morning Felix, how are you feeling?" Leedo, Felix's doctor asked as they sat down for his monthly check up. They see each other so often that Leedo was ok with Felix calling him by his first name, plus it makes him feel young for someone who is 32.

"Morning Leedo, Yes I feel fine thank you for asking" Felix replied, slightly fidgeting in his seat, even though this was a monthly occurrence it didn't stop him from feeling slightly scared each time.

"Did you forego your scent blockers like I asked you?" Leedo got out his clipboard so they could begin, they always started with questions first and then a quick procedure after.

"Of course, people kept blocking their noses as I walked past them" One of the many things Leedo needed to check on was Felix's scent as it was a lot stronger than average omegas, he is always asked to not wear his scent blockers a day before his appointment. That way Leedo can analyse the smell throughout the visit and check for anything wrong.

"Did anything weird happen?"

"Nope, it's just really strong, I wear the scent blockers because I once made someone pass out" this comment caused Leedo to laugh a little, writing down his notes like always. Felix could never understand why his scent was so much stronger, but after that day he refuses to leave the apparent without scent blockers unless his doctor asks him.

"What was your slick like this month?" now it was time for the nitty gritty.

The more important issue Leedo always asked about was Felix's slick, because he had a rare condition that caused him to overproduce slick, or produce slick at random times, or even produce slick inside where it has nowhere to go so every month Felix had a needle stuck into him to get rid of the slick or else his insides may explode.

"Annoying as always. I always leak if I sneeze or fart. and when I touch myself I always have to lay a towel down because I turn into a faucet at that point" Felix rants, and he (on the side) watches as Leedo writes everything down with caution. "Also, I fear that I'm a little more swollen than last month, it's been hurting the last few days" Felix admits, I mean he is talking to his doctor so there was no use trying to hide it, he's been seeing Leedo for over 5 years now!

"Oh dear, I better take a look then, please take your pants off then I'll help lift your legs into the stirrups" now it was time for the procedure, Felix never liked needles but he was used to it at this point. It was either needles or a possible surgery!

Once Felix was in position, he closed his eyes and proceeded to take deep breaths, trying his best to stay calm and pretend he was elsewhere.

It worked for long enough until Leedo explained that he was going to begin, a whimper left Felix's lips and a few tears were shed as it always did when the needle pierced his insides, thankfully the stirrups stopping him from moving around too much.

"Shh I know, you're doing so well, not long left" Leedo tried his best to sympathise and comfort even though he was the one causing the pain. The vile was halfway full and once it was almost full no more was coming out which meant Leedo had gotten all of it out, he sighed with relief and removed the needle making sure to dispose of it correctly.

"All done and all gone, you can relax now, and also get dressed" Leedo handed Felix some tissues and then undid the straps that kept his legs in place. "I'll see you next month, enjoy your weekend" Leedo was waving Felix outside of the door.

"How did it go? all good?" Wooyoung, Felix's roommate and best friend who always drove him home afterwords (since it was advised that Felix shouldn't drive himself home) asked. Felix could only muster up a nod though as he was feeling quite tired and wanted to sleep during the car ride home.

"FELIX WILL YOU HURRY YOUR ASS UP" Wooyoung called from outside the door, he was waiting for Felix to finish his business but it seemed as if he was taking forever.

"Fucking hell Woo I'm coming, calm your tits" Felix flushed, and washed his hands before exiting, "and you were listening to me poo because?"

"EW! I was not listening! I just don't wanna be late for this party. Seonghwa always calls us out for being late" Wooyoung was fixing his hair in the mirror they had next to the front door, just making sure it looked good.

"Babe you look fine lets go, you're the one who doesn't wanna be late!" Felix ushered the both of them out of the door before they started to head to the party.

It was a frat party hosted by the most elite and most difficult to get into frat. Felix heard that you had to have a rich background, drive a fancy car, and have no problems with anything that happens at the frat before they even consider accepting you.

Joining a frat was never something Felix wanted to do though, besides the obvious not wanting to go through hell week; he didn't wanna host parties every week or be forced to drink every day or only be allowed to date girls who were from sororities and boys who were from frats which was for some reason a rule at Yeontan.

Now don't get Felix wrong, he loves a good cocktail or having a shot but every day? That thought had Felix hurling in his mind. Felix had nothing against frat guys, he's even friends with some, he's just happy he isn't one of them.

"Hwa-hyung, I told you we wouldn't be late" Wooyoung exclaimed, giving Seonghwa a very tight hug which pulled Felix from his thoughts.

"Yeah, you're on time for once! Jimin texted me and said the others are already inside" Seonghwa showed his phone, but it was only close enough for Wooyoung to see.

"Oh thank god, cause I could use a fucking drink."

"Me too my friend, me too."

Once they got inside, it was nothing short of a true frat party! loud music booming from every corner, a bowl of condoms, a bowl of most likely spiked fruit punch, random bowls of chips, a plate of special brownies and of course the fully stocked bar.

There was a cup system in place so that everyone knew your status, this was implemented into most parties so that there were no incidents; red meant single, gold meant it's complicated, silver meant either taken or not interested, and black meant you were a frat or sorority member.

Felix always chose between red or silver, and it always depended on if he was in the mood to deflect drunk assholes or not. Today he went for silver, not really having the energy to talk to randos and wants to focus on having a good time with his friends. Wooyoung picked up red though, feeling in the mood to be laid.

As the night progressed, drinks were drank, and the music somehow got even louder, Felix spotted someone he had never seen before, he was holding a red cup and practically skulling it. Felix was stood to the side, watching as his friends danced closely and took some videos of them for the future memories.

Said someone walked over to Felix and smiled, holding another red cup with him.

"You look like you could use a drink, here" the strange person handed one of the red cups to Felix, but once he looked inside he sighed.

"I'm allergic to yeast, so I can't have beer" Felix shook his head and tried his best to be polite considering beer was the most easily accessible drink and this man didn't know of his allergies.

"Oh I'm sorry, I didn't know" the man took a few steps back in fear of what Felix may say next.

"Are you new? I've never seen you at these?" Felix walked closer to the strange yet totally hot person and asked. A strong wift of what could only be described as nature hit his nose and it made him gulp, he smelt good, like really good.

"Ah no, I actually go to Jongsung. My name is Chan and that's my friend Yeosang eating chips" Chan pointed to a another strange person who was grabbing himself a handful of chips.

Jongsung? oh hell no!

"What are you doing here at a Yeontan party? you have to show your Yeontan ID to get in" Felix said rather rudely after finding out they weren't from Yeontan.

Chan looked a little taken aback, but he totally understood why. Yeontan and Jongsung students haven't really been on the best of terms ever since the incident.

The people involved were defiantly punished for it, but it left Jongsung with a bad rep and quite a few people transferred over to Yeontan because they felt unsafe.

"I'm sorta friends with one of the frat guys, Jisung, and he let me and my friend Yeosang in"

"Your friends with Han Jisung? he never told me that the little shit!"

"I'm guessing your friends with him then"

"yeah, he's in my friend group,..." Felix turned his head at the sound of a loud scream, face palming when it was just drunk Wooyoung almost falling over. "For fucks sake Woo, please excuse me" Felix walked away from a smirking Chan, kinda glad he no longer had to talk to someone from Jongsung. Like he was hot, but was he hot enough to not be from Yeontan?

"Taehyung! why did you give him another vodka cranberry, you know how he gets when he has vodka" Felix was so annoyed that Jisung let Jongsung students in that he could no longer enjoy himself.

"Don't blame me, it was Hyunjin who gave them to us. I saved him from falling by the way!"

"Well wheres Hyunjin then? cause this party kinda sucks!"

The next day Felix's phone was met with a bunch of un-read messages, considering he turned it off off when he and Wooyoung left the party early.

Wooyoung had gotten a little too drunk, and Felix wanted to leave anyway so he happily took Wooyoung back to their dorm where Woo convinced Felix for some late night cuddles.

Beautiful sluts bunch

Jisung - Where did you and Woo run off to? I didn't see you last night!

Taehyung - Yeah man you totally took off after Woo's almost slip

Jisung - Almost slip?

Taehyung - Woo almost fell over and crushed his leg, but I saved him

Seonghwa - come on guys I'm sure they have a good reason

Jimin - They better cause I lost my dancing partner

Yoongi - It is way too fucking early for my phone to be making this much noise

Hyunjin - I feel you Yoons, my head hurts like a bitch!

Jimin - Too many wet pussy shots am I right 🤣🤣

Jisung - Are they even awake?

Felix - Yes I'm awake you shithead, but Woo's sleeping so shush with all the messages

Seungmin - Where did you go? Sungie and I missed you

Felix - Woo got like falling over drunk so I took him home, plus I wasn't feeling it and kinda wanted to go myself

Seonghwa - That's fine, I hope Youngie is ok?

Felix - I mean I might have to help him throw up but other than that I think he will be fine

Jimin - Aw sending my love

Taehyung - Yeah me too!

Yoongi - I send my love too if it will get you all to stop texting and let me sleep!

Hyunjin - Feed him western breakfast food it's a great hangover cure

Felix - GUYS HE'S NOT DYING CHILL

"Lixie?..." Felix turned his head when he heard a small whimper from next to him.

"Morning gorgeous, how you feeling?" Felix sat up and helped Wooyoung to sit up as well.

"I think I might be sick, oh god" that was Felix's cue to rush both of them into the bathroom, and order McDonalds with one hand and softly rub Wooyoung's back with the other.

Later that day after all his classes had finished for the day was when Felix decided to confront Jisung about Chan.

Felix just never grasped how some people could hang out with them. Ever since the incident last year both Felix and Woo never wanted anything to do with Jongsung again.

Sungie 💚💚

Felix - Since when are you friends with people from Jongsung?

Jisung - Oh so you met Chan last night, I meant to tell you

Felix - Ok and?

Jisung - Felix, not everyone from Jongsung is a bad person. Chan and I went to the same high school he's a cool dude

Felix - Does he know what happened?

Jisung - I'm not sure, it's not really something I wanted to bring up. We just hang out sometimes and I've rapped on a few of his tracks

Felix - Look I'm sorry ok! It's just what happened to Woo, and I live with him so I'm the one calming him down from episodes or comforting his nightmares, it fucked him up Sungie

Jisung - Trust me, I wouldn't wish that even on my enemies, but only 2 people were involved, not the whole fucking student body of Jongsung

Felix - I'll try my best ok

Felix didn't see Chan again until next weekend, at yet another frat party, he assumed Jisung let him in again.

It took all Felix had to not ask why he didn't go to his own university's party, instead he smiled and said hello like a normal person.

"Felix! we need to stop meeting here like this" Chan had that smirk on again, and Felix partnered along with his blush. As much as he didn't like Jongsung he couldn't lie and say Chan was ugly or that Chan didn't wanna make him suck his dick.

"Yeah I know, a little weird right?" Felix tried his best to keep his cool, but he knew that Chan could see his blush. His face was so red anyone could see it from a mile away.

"I got you a drink, don't worry it's just rum n coke, I remembered" Chan winked as he handed over the cup. Felix's insides did a little backflip, he remembered I can't have beer? oh my...

"You scent, it's pretty strong" Chan commented, leaning against the wall for support.

"Uh...yeah, I have a condition..." Felix nervously answered, and kept it vague because he only met Chan last week and didn't wanna tell him his sob story just yet.

"Maybe we should get some ice-cream sometime?" Chan joked, considering Felix's scent was coconut

"Hmm, maybe, but lets dance first" Felix didn't know what came over him, maybe it was the fireball shots Jimin somehow convinced everyone to do. But as he pulled Chan over to the dance floor, all his worries seemed to go away.

Felix even introduced Chan to Wooyoung, who was too busy grinding against Jimin and making out to notice. But Felix just assumed it was Woo being Woo, he always loved to makeout when drunk and Jimin was known as the guy who was down for anything so.

Over the next few days, besides going to class and the endless hours of dance practice, Felix spent his time thinking about Chan. He was so annoyed with himself with how much he was thinking about him but it was hard not to.

It may have been wrong for Felix to completely write off Jongsung when Jisung was right, only 2 students were involved with the incident but it was just so hard to not blame the school. Especially when the incident happened on school grounds.

Which was why it was plaguing his mind even more how Chan was able to get him to bring down his walls, and in a short matter of time no less.

"So, you like him?" Hyunjin queried, while taking a sip of his chocolate frappuccino.

"I didn't say that-" Felix tried to protest.

"The blush on your face says otherwise" Jimin smirked, taking a sip of his matcha frappuccino.

It seemed Felix was the only one who got a hot drink, his hands slightly shaking as he went to grab his piping americano.

"Chill everyone let the poor boy speak!" Seonghwa sighed, sometimes he hated being the mom friend but at other times he knew he had to be otherwise the whole friendship group would be an absolute mess.

"Thanks Hwa-Hyung, I don't know if I like like him, but I don't hate him and it's messing with me. Cause on one hand I'm like he's bad he's from Jongsung and on the other hand I'm like but he wasn't one of them plus he's hot as fuck and I had a wet dream the other night about sucking his dick" Felix ranted, but was thankful he was finally able to get that out.

"Could it be pre heat? I know when mine hits my emotions get all weird" Wooyoung asked.

"No, I'm not due for another two weeks, so it's not that" Felix pondered, his seasonly heat always came towards the end of the season, and it was only the start of August.

"Well what ever you decide just know I'll be here for you, we all will be" Wooyoung put one arm around Felix and pulled him in for a side hug, which was very welcomed in this situation.

"Of course we will, we love you always" Seonghwa added on, giving a sweet smile.

"Are we planning anything tonight? I kinda wanna go out" Wooyoung asked.

"On a Tuesday?" Felix laughed and shook his head.

"Not out out just like a movie or something?"

"I can't, Tuesdays are one of my stream days remember?" Jimin declined, considering the streams were how he made his money.

"Ew you and your streams" Wooyoung shook his head and decided to not ask any further, even though he watched majority of his streams and commented for moral support.

"You wouldn't be "ewing" me if you knew how much money I'm making" Jimin smirked, he knew his friends were ok with him being a camboy, they even watched but they never wanted to participate.

"I just texted Taehyung what you told us and he said that you most probably like him, and that you should most defiantly suck his dick but only if he promises to suck yours after" Hyunjin showed his phone and Felix only whined.

"Hyungggggggggggggggg."

[withleeknow]

lmao not the big work screen that's brave of you here's another one but less 😵 and more 🥰 vm.tiktok.com/ZGe378eMP/ - genuine q. concerning 🐹/🐈‍⬛: when are we never in the rabbithole??? *complains about the microwave*- *proceeds to feed the microwave* speaking of, hi welcome to your en-o'clock era 👀 this compilation is the most accurate preview of what's in store: vm.tiktok.com/ZGe37yXGA/

icl seungmin and mimo in ate?? still not over that bridge + that genre of mimo? i'm thinking the Δ composition = fwb/fboy!mimo + pining-bsf!seungmin 😶‍🌫️ WT: I CAN HEAR THE COGS TURNING + SENSE THE ANGST FROM MILES AWAY ISTG WOMAN THE REVEALLLL I'M GONNA SCREAM 🕊🦋

“what am i doing with an enhypen album” im crying 😭😭 consider yourself ✨️ influenced ✨️ she really is the prettiest - I didn't realise just how cute/cozy their photoshoot concepts were for inceptio 🥺 also asia!! 💓 whereabouts are you headed?

i'm surprised you're still here bc 🥟's given us not one but TWO ig lives this week 😭😭 AND THE TOUR CLIPS SO FAR?? BANGCHAN??! SMILEY MIMO W/ HIS BLUE HOODIE? THE THUNDEROUS STAGE?!!

i'm already on ep 27 bc i'm a fast watcher lol but YOOOOOOOO why did nobody tell me about niki 😭 he's ADORABLE YO, my new son omg i immediately adopted him. the most precious baby someone protect him at all costs 😭 also i've been looking at sunghoon lol we're pleasantly surprised. i had zero clue about his personality but after watching this, hello....... interesting....... just hear me out - he reminds me of mimo sometimes :o personality wise and also in some shots he looks like mimo to me lolll. ALSO i'm sure you've probably seen this but it came up on my explore page the other day and i watched it like 20 times in a row lskdfhalsd 🤣

2min △ 😭 we need to stop being on the same frequency bc i thought about it once and while a hyunho △ has the potential to run along lines of being in lurv with your buddy's gf, a 2min △ just has to stem from (childhood) best friends :o

i'm equally excited and nervous to post wt7.5 bc while i like some of the bits in this one, idk how people will receive it bc yk... angst. but we'll see in a few days akskjshd 😭

i'm going to vietnam for like 3 weeks hehehe. OH and i keep forgetting to tell you, my friend is going to music bank madrid and she asked me if i wanted to come too. unfortunately i'm out of paid leave and i have a jonas brothers concert (in my defense i bought the ticket last august before all the drama 🤣) a couple days after that, but imagine if we both to music bank together 😭 that... would be kinda insane methinks

🥟 has been so active with his lives lately i'm so in love with him :((( that newlywed life is treating him well i see, i should be their roommate i don't mind thirdwheeling

everything about the tour is driving me crazy. the setlist (although no charmer is a major L for me, rip), the looks, the solo stages (i cannot tell you how in love i am with mimo's hair. i'm still trying to process it), the merch especially the mood lamps and the stress balls (i caved and ordered a foxiny one) and the new skzoos doing UPPIES I WANT THEM SO BAD (and look oh my god they can hold hands) I CAN'T REMEMBER THE LAST TIME I WANTED SOMETHING SO BADLY 😭 i love that while everyone else was doing horny numbers and getting freaky on main, seungmin had a mike wazowski guitar moment and mimo had a babygurl stage lolll. ngl i couldn't really focus watching the thunderous performance bc they were SO sparkly lmaooo i love the babygirl-esque fits 😂

[themomsandthecity]

We Asked a Celebrity Doula Our Pressing Pregnancy Questions

Though precious, birth work isn't without pressure. Doulas are helping bring new life into this world, supporting the people doing the birthing so that they can, in turn, support their newborn babies. Now, imagine you're a doula to the stars. That's the reality for Lori Bregman, whose clients include Kristen Bell, Kate Hudson, Kelly Rowland, and Anne Hathaway. Bregman has 25 years and more than 1,500 births under her belt. She began her career as a celebrity masseuse, but felt called to birth work. "I was always drawn to working with pregnant women," Bregman tells PS. "Everything I learned - whether it was body work or nutrition or yoga or spiritual coaching - I kept gearing it toward pregnancy, birthing, or new moms." Bregman's clients typically seek her out five weeks or so into their pregnancies, but sometimes as early as when they're trying to conceive. The doula's prenatal support includes nutritional advice, birth prep, body work, and she's also there during labor. "I am basically their support system throughout the whole journey," Bregman says. Now, Bregman has a new gig as the doula in residence for the supplement brand Needed. "Literally, it's the only product I recommend," she says. Bregman personally takes the Women's Multi, along with Needed's Stress Support and Cognitive Support supplements. As part of the partnership, Bregman has a recurring advice column. Thankfully, PS was able to get a preview and pick Bregman's brain on pregnancy, birth work, and, essentially, how to turn the delivery room into a spa. View this post on Instagram A post shared by Lori Bregman ✌❤😄🍀🌟🙌 (@lbreggy) PS: What does a typical work day look like for you? Lori Bregman: Every day is a trip. Right now I'm on call for about four or five births. I go to bed at night not knowing if I'm gonna wake up in my bed or not. Being a doula makes you incredibly flexible. I always plan my day but I never know if I'm gonna have to cancel. My famous last words are, "If I'm not at a birth, I can be there." But in a typical day, I do a lot of education. I do tons of birth prep all day long with my clients. Yesterday I went from client to client to client prepping them for birth. A lot of it is building relationships - and building deep relationships. As I'm birth prepping, my clients are texting me all day long. Then I go to bed like at 8:00 p.m. because, like I said, I never know if I'm gonna wake up and have to go to a birth at 2:00 in the morning. PS: That keeps you on your toes. LB: Yeah, the one thing that keeps me really going is my daily self-care routine. Any birth worker will tell you that. It's like what I tell the moms I work with: if you don't put that oxygen mask on yourself, you can't take care of others and serve others. That usually means going for hikes in nature with my dogs, taking all my supplements, going to bed early, journaling and doing my morning rituals. It really helps fuel me so I can go back out into the world and give. It's such a rewarding career but can also be taxing on the body if you don't take care of yourself. PS: You have a few famous clients. How does that come about? How does one become a celebrity doula, and do you find that it changes the work in any way? LB: Back before I was a doula, I was the masseuse of Hollywood. So, this was my clientele before. I think the reason all these celebrities like to work with me is 'cause I don't treat them any different from anybody else that I work with. There's a sense of normalcy where they can just be themselves and not have to be "on" or be that public person. They can just drop in and really be who they are. I really don't work any different with them than I do with my other clients. To me, everybody's kind of a celebrity, you know? I try to treat all my clients like they are. PS: What are your top recommendations for expecting parents who can't afford a doula, but would still like to access some of… https://www.popsugar.com/family/lori-bregman-celebrity-doula-interview-49361735?utm_source=dlvr.it&utm_medium=tumblr

[ebullient-beauty]

- - - fuck you dumber - - -

aged up mike wheeler x bimbo cheerleader reader warnings for the series: agedup!mike wheeler, smut, swearing, nsfw warnings for the preview: agedup!mike wheeler, swearing, references of sexual actions, nsfw

preview: Mike Wheeler, aka Wheeler Boy, was elated. He had recently gotten to be Dungeon Master during a Hellfire meeting, he was doing good in school, but best of all, he had a fucking hot girlfriend. You were one of the most popular girls at Hawkins High, being part of the cheer team helped with that, but that wasn't why. It was because you were… sexy and you fucking knew it. So you dressed like it too. Short skirts, deep V-necks, almost everything being some shade of pink, and every once in a while you wore that dress that was so small you had to wear shorts underneath.

But Mike loved it. He loved seeing you feel at home in the spotlight, he loved overhearing you talk about him to your cheerleader friends, he loved when you called him over to the popular people table, "Wheeler Boy! Get over here!", and loved when he got to sit next to you while you made it obvious to the jocks sitting near that you were off limits. But what he loved a whole lot was that fact that sometimes (most of the time, actually) you would tease him for the full school day and then get him off or let him fuck you the second you guys went home.

You only ever teased Mike for a day, knowing how he got when unfulfilled, but you had decided 3 days ago that you would try to torture him for as long as possible so he would fuck you the way you really wanted. He had only ever done you like that one time before, when he went a full 2 weeks without seeing you because he was in California. When he got back- let's just say you could not walk correctly for a full day. But he had left you craving for it, for that feeling where you knew he held absolutely nothing back from you.

You had your wonderful idea planned to the T and written in your notebook, and tomorrow was the day you would put it into action. You knew to play your cards right, you couldn't make it obvious that you were teasing him relentlessly. So the plan was as follows:

Thursday- Day One: Excuse of not meeting with him after school is that I have cheer practice and after family dinner, then off to bed.

Friday- Day Two: Excuse of not meeting with him after school is that he has Hellfire and by the time it's over, I'm "too tired".

Saturday & Sunday- Days 3 & 4: I'm out of town with my parents for a family gathering at Aunt Rosie's house.

Monday- Day 5: Excuse is that I have cheer practice and after I'm going to Cathy's house to study and sleep over.

Tuesday- Day 6: Basketball game that I'm required to attend, because cheerleader, duh and we leave during last period.

Wednesday- Day 7: Cheer meet after school and then all the girls and I are having a sleepover party at Nicole's house

Thursday- Day 8: Plan for Armageddon Wheeler Boy

And that was all you had. After a week of torturing your poor boyfriend, you didn't know whether it could go on past that. You sighed in exhilaration, opening the drawer on your nightstand, and slipping in the journal before shutting it closed. As you laid in bed, all you could think was that this is gonna be fun.

part 1 [unavailable atm] part 2 [unavailable atm] part 3 [unavailable atm] part 4 [unavailable atm] part 5 [unavailable atm] part 6 [unavailable atm] part 7 [unavailable atm] part 8 [unavailable atm]

DM me or reply to a post to be added to the taglist!

[mike wheeler] taglist: @riouri @marsneo @clonewifey49 @m1ke-wheeler @madtheivery @b0kutoswaifu @w-wheeler @littletroublegirl444 @agustdeeyaa @smileyswifeyy @im-better-than-your-newborn @vl-p @doingurmom69 @elainavmarie @kingsmanperfecthartwin @lovelycm @joekeeryhoe @dontforgetabtdharms @justbreeisfine

[fuck you dumber] taglist: @riouri @dragonsvelour @morganasimp26 @strawberrykittyv @luv4mike @whitemanswhore101 @shawtyasf1 @lovenotesxo @givemehickeysplease @mikewheelersactualgf @angelar4 @sspikey69 @buckys-slave @sunflower-120 @justmsstuff @tsukishimawhore @tragicdiary @okjaeminn @trashmouth-munson-thingss @grffdbicv @bucket-hat-bestie @runninngyouth @smodgie @uhmislaigs-blog @hdhdhdhdhs-stuff @prom1es @xxxjaexx @nicciekawegosblog @pytbasha888 @yoirfriendlyneigborhoodfairy @dayntplanet @ilovemitskii @riiikaaa @turtleshroooms @smileyswifeyy @sappynappysworld @vl-p @str4nd3d-lull4by @yourleastfavx @ady-hilborn @strxvnge @miiikkeey @raquel12 @mushroomsoup1920 @doingurmom69 @renssonly @viixen01 @irinity @elainavmarie @justlillythinking @kingsmanperfecthartwin @cybergiirl @justbreeisfine @222micah222 @bigwhore4levi

[pjisskullourful]

ok someone sent me a coffee& it reminded me i was gonna post THIS preview too!

this was gonna be the start of the new installment of the baby spinoff but now i have started writing something to come before this

whatever it was inspired by this moment

another preview- coming whenever soonish maybe

"We need the baby."

You looked up from the infant in your arms to find Damiano had come into the nursery. You had just finished burping Bowie after his feeding and you were anticipating that he would be asleep soon.

"What d'ya mean?" You asked, not rushing to get up from the armchair and hand your son over.

"Me and Ethan- we need the baby 'cause we need all the boys together to teach them how to shave."

You laughed. "My five-week-old baby, you need to teach my five-week-old baby and his six-year-old brother how to shave?"

He smiled, too delighted by this scenario to be stopped by your questions. "Exactly right. Ethan was about to start, and Moe was doing his thing where he has to ask a million questions, so we figured it'd be easier to just teach him. We're gonna put shaving cream on him and everything, but don't worry, no aftershave near his sensitive baby skin. Bowie's not sleeping, is he?"

"Not right now."

Damiano's smile grew even wider when he came over to stand beside the chair, looking down at Bowie with pure glee. "Hey baby Bowie, hey. You wanna spend time with daddies, don't ya? Yeah, I bet you do." He crouched down. "What's that? No, I'm sure Mama knows it's not 'cause you think she's boring or anything shady like that. But sometimes guy time is necessary and I know Mama understands that." He carried on this imagined conversation without looking at you, as if he would be doing this even if you weren't in the room. "Oh, you are completely correct- Mama understands that 'cause she is the smartest woman in the whole world.

"Wow, so perceptive. He's barely a month old, but nothin' gets past him, eh?" Damiano asked, turning to you and the glimmer in his eyes made you smile too.

You started to hand your son over into the safety of Damiano's arms. "You guys don't need to shave…"

"Uhm, yes we do. Do you really think that either myself or Ethan are gonna show up to this date not looking our best?"

He was taking it far too seriously, an unnecessary amount of effort for a scheduled date night between people who were raising four kids together.

It was to be your first night away from Bowie, an opportunity for the three of you to exist away from the responsibilities of parenthood. Victoria was going to be babysitting Bowie, while the older three kids would be taken care of by Thomas and River. River was due to have their first baby in six months and the couple were trying to get in as much practice as possible. They were taking Cosmo, Sylvia and Marsha to an arcade, getting to enjoy nothing but playtime.

You were going with your boyfriends to the Four Seasons, checking in to the executive suite for one night. No toys to trip over, no clothes to be washed, no homework to help with, no meals to prepare - a chance to just be three people in love.

You got up from the seat, following Damiano out of the room. Once in the hallway, you went in a different direction to him - heading to the twins bedroom while he left for the master bedroom. You found the little girls having a play in front of their dollhouse, sharing their plastic figures without any issues. They didn't notice you in the doorway, they were too consumed in their own world as they happily babbled to one another.

You left them to it, going to check how the adventure in shaving was unfolding. Through the master bedroom, you could hear so much activity coming from the ensuite. The door was open, allowing you to see into the room where Ethan and Damiano were standing shirtless at the vanity counter. They both had shaving cream covering their faces.

"You wanna put the cream on your face for about five minutes before you start to shave…" Damiano said and once you were close enough you could see that he was talking to Cosmo, who was seated on the counter, his back to the mirror. His face was white with shaving cream just as his fathers were.

"Maybe longer, if you find a filter that you wanna spend a couple of hours goofing around with- eh, Papa?" Ethan teased.

You leant against the archway, seeing where Bowie was strapped into his car seat, propped up on the shut toilet seat. His eyes were open and jumping all over the room, entertained for the moment.

You didn't want to intrude, you could tell that your boyfriends were getting lost in their own world, sharing the banter and teases that they never tired of. Now Cosmo was being included into their jokes, with a spot already set aside for Bowie. You backed into the bedroom, keeping out of their way. You sat down on the bed, within earshot, not missing a single one of Cosmo's gleeful laughs.

This was an aspect of your relationship that didn't need a tune-up, that didn't require special attention. This flow between the three of you never faded, never wavered no matter how much time passed between scheduled special 'parents time'.

There were times when it seemed your family couldn’t fit anywhere. There wasn't any representation you could show to your kids. People still didn't understand the word throuple - it always had to be followed with an explanation. You had yet to come across any official forms (from the hospital or information that went to the government, amongst other important paperwork) that allowed you to list more than one partner. Even at theme parks, a family deal only included two adults.

Questions dogged your every footstep and there were so many reminders that this wasn't the norm.

But when it was the three of you taking care of your kids, and each other - there weren't any questions. You fit perfectly with your two boyfriends and they fit perfectly with your children, allowing you to take a backseat. Everything ran according to its own flow and you didn't even have to try.

"Mama, Mama!" Cosmo was shouting as he came running into the bedroom, his face clean. "Papa shaved my moustache, look…"

He jumped up onto the bed, beaming as he shuffled toward you. You were thankful (but not surprised) to see there wasn't anything different on his angelic face. The bottom half looked slightly pink, clearly just rubbed clean.

You moved in, putting your hands on his cheeks as you squinted carefully at his upper-lip. "Hang on, did they- look that way for me, Mr Moe." He turned his face toward the light, already beginning to giggle in his anticipation. "Oh, I thought I saw a hair, but I was wrong, that moustache is totally gone."

Damiano's head poked out from the bathroom. "Don't you mean his Moe-stache?"

"You gotta come back Moe- you're not done 'til the aftershave is on." Ethan urged.

"Oh, right." Cosmo rushed back to join his awaiting dads.

They were still messing about with the aftershave when the doorbell rang. You had barely gotten to your feet, when you began to hear Marsha's repeated chants that she would answer the door. Your daughter moved much faster than you, rushing her way down the staircase.

"Aunty Vic."

"What's good, babygirl?" Victoria's chipper voice responded, quickly followed by the sounds of their hands clapping together.

By the time that you arrived to the entryway, the bassist was just wrapping up the secret handshake she shared with Marsha (Victoria had developed a unique handshake for each of your children - something that wasn't allowed to be performed by either yourself or your boyfriends, they belonged solely to Victoria).

[ihassheepquake]

DC's Stargirl 3.06 "Chapter Six: The Betrayal" has aired on the CW, and I'm here to talk about it.

We're not gonna talk about this being several days late. It's midterm season and I'm plotting a book, leave me alone.

I'm so excited about this episode. From the previews, there's gonna be a fight between Courtney and the rest of the JSA, and I love nothing more in a story than interparty conflict. And Yolanda found the Gambler's laptop in Cindy's room, which means even more drama! Plus, some of them are realizing that Sylvester is kind of a bitch, which is a third source of drama. Always a good time.

Opening on a Rick in the gym testing his super strength scene? I keep finding more and more reasons to find him incredibly hot. And he has more than an hour of strength now! That's pretty cool and definitely will not be causing any problems to his body whatsoever.

Mr. Bones is doing a puzzle while watching everyone, like a crazy person.

Now, I'm not a fan of religion. But I do enjoy it when it can be used to offer up moral conflicts within characters. Yolanda definitely has some things to learn and has some deconstruction of her own trauma to do. And if this is how she needs to learn about it, then so be it.

Obviously, Cameron is going to learn that Courtney is Stargirl and all of the drama that will come from that sometime this season. But I really hope that they'll do something interesting and let Courtney actually tell him. Ideally, she'll even be the one to tell him about her involvement in what happened with his dad. I think it'd be very in-character for Courtney and it would be something different from the tropes.

Jakeem and Mike are bringing Cindy flowers and chocolate, holy shit. This is such a funny B-plot. Made even funnier by her slamming the door in their faces.

Everything is so tense and ominous in this meeting the parents or whatever scene. It's kind of creepy too. I love it. Just gods, what the fuck are the grandparents going to do to Courtney? You know they're gonna do something!

Okay, I'm warming up to Camney. I'll admit it. They're so sweet!

You know what, good for Cindy at least trying not to immediately fight and go the whole "can we please just have a conversation real quick?" route. Though I have been waiting for this fight, so fight! Rick maybe seems angrier than usual? Is the now seemingly unlimited strength from the Hourglass already starting to have an effect on him? Courtney does maybe deserve the roasting just a little bit.

Poor Cindy.

I'm all for the interparty drama. Does Courtney deserve this? No. Does that make it even better? Yes. But yeah, Cameron doesn't deserve to be treated as a threat just because of his dad. If Courtney can show him he can do something else, which she already has, then doesn't he deserve the chance to do that something else? And Cindy deserves the chance to grow and change too. We've seen her this season clearly wanting to do that. But the others are too blind to let either of them. Which is also true about Sylvester and it's why I don't think he should be the leader of the team. But at least he's starting to realize that about himself after his fight with the Crocks. But he's still so blinded.

Surveillance has been revealed! They're on their way to getting into the real plot!

It's time to start fucking around with the mid-season reveal of this season. Episodes 7 and 8 are a two-parter, and one of them is probably where we'll start (re)meeting Jade and Obsidian, who I believe were both confirmed to appear this season. The post-credit preview does show some shadowy powers being used, which could be the return of Shade or the introduction of Obsidian. We'll just have to see. I'm super interested to see how they're gonna incorporate Infinity Inc into this whole thing. The next two episodes are going to be crazy. All this and more revealed next week with DC's Stargirl 3.07 "Chapter Seven: Infinity Inc, Part 1".

[itsxcowboyrocksteady]

Some Updates

I'm just talking about some things here for anyone that's interested or has been following along and wondering where some things are or when it's gonna post.

Under the keep reading, you'll see the following topics:

I Have New Followers???? Welcome!!!!!!!

Fluffy Claudette Holiday One Shot

Ghost Face (Danny Johnson/Jed Olsen) One Shot

A New Dwight One Shot

Opening Requests????????

Credit for post divider art : https://firefly-graphics.tumblr.com/post/651464983782260736/artist-au-dividers-12

1. I Have New Followers???? Welcome!!!!!!!

Everyone that followed me recently, thank you! Welcome! If you stumbled onto my blog because of my dbd fics, I hope you like the stuff I have in the works right now. If you stumbled onto it for a different reason, thank you for deciding to hang out!

2. Fluffy Claudette Holiday One Shot

I'm working on it and will hopefully have it done before the week is over. I was going to work on it some today, but Mondays are always the most hectic at work because I'm catching up on 4 days worth of messages and tasks.

3. Ghost Face (Danny Johnson/Jed Olsen) One Shot

I mentioned that I was going to be doing a one shot for Ghostie as an apology for being so late with the Claudette fic. I think what I'm gonna do is just write a piece that is supposed to go into a longer fic for him which I think I mentioned might be a possibility? That way it will also serve as something of a preview for it whenever I get to do it. It's not going to be an x Reader, though since the larger story deals with an OC I'm working on.

But I will be working on more x Reader stuff for him too, once I have everything else done.

4. A New Dwight One Shot

In between writing things sometimes I write other things. I was playing dbd the other night with a friend and we were talking about which cosmetics we like for our survivor crushes (he's thirsty for David and obviously I've got it bad for Dweet lol) and then I decided to write a really self indulgent smutty Dwight x Reader because I'm a loose cannon and can't be stopped. That one will post in between the Claudette fic and the Ghost Face one.

5. Opening Requests????????

This one is gonna be a little longer.

I've mentioned that this is something I've thought about doing for a bit and I'd really like to at least try. I'm hoping to do this sometime before the month is out, but if that doesn't happen, it'll be sometime before mid February. I have some stuff going on in early February so if I can't have that all done by the end of January, it only makes sense to hold off until I'm totally in the clear. And I want to wait until the 3 things I mentioned above are finished and posted, too.

The biggest hurdle right now is writing up my rules and stuff because I'm trying to format it in a way that looks OK to me. It's more for my staticky brain than it is for actual aesthetics and I'm trying to do it in a way that my mind won't hate when I look at it.

Also I'm trying to figure out how to word everything because I've tried to start a post in my drafts, but nothing sounds right. And I eventually want to write for other fandoms and not just dbd, so I'm going to be doing individual posts on each fandom to link into that at some point when it becomes relevant.

Still, I might simply make a side blog for the other stuff since this one is pretty heavy into dbd now.

I guess that's it for now. I'll keep you all updated on stuff as I go. Thanks for taking interest in my silly fanfics xD.

[xxisxxisxxis]

Gateway Drug | Part Sixty-Five

A/N: If you didn't see my post yesterday, I decide to break this chapter into 2 chapters. The preview for this chapter is included in the next chapter.

Words: 3.7k

Warning(s): Explicit language, mentions of drug abuse

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I blink my eyes open to see Izzy standing over me, my brows furrowing at the sight of him, confusion filing into my mind.

“Izzy.” I croak out, closing my eyes again for a moment.

“Viv.” He replies.

"What're you doing here?" I groan, tiredly.

"A girl I hooked up with last night lives in this neighborhood." He tells me. "Karen let me in."

“Of course she did.” I mumble, sitting up with another groan, and he sits on the floor next to me, pulling a cigarette out of his pocket, lighting it.

“So, like, what happened?” He asks me, looking around at the shithole mess I made last night and I lick my cracked lips, feeling the tightness of dried, mascara coated tears that have glued to my face, and let out an exhausted breath.

“You ever walk into your house and wonder ‘exactly how many surfaces did my husband and his mistress possibly have sex on’?”

“Nope.” He replies, blowing out smoke, and I glance at him.

“Well, that’s what happened.” I reply, sighing. “I thought I was doing good, Izzy. I really thought we were getting better. And we weren’t. It was all bullshit.”

“Trust me, Viv, I’ve fucking been there.” He mumbles.

“I gave her a key to my house.” I repeat what I told him earlier and he looks at me for a moment, looking as if he doesn’t quite know what to say. “I might as well have just handed him over to her and said, ‘he’s yours, have at it’.” I add, letting out a chuckle, although it’s not funny. “I’m not like her. I act nothing like her. I haven’t accomplished as much as she has. I’m not established like she is. I look nothing like her--”

“--She’s a ten but the drugs make her a five. And her being batshit crazy knocks her down to a solid two...on a good day. You’re a ten. Your niceness adds two points, your patience adds two more points, and your crazy is hot, which adds five more points. So technically you’re a seventeen. Don’t compare yourself to a fucking crack addict when there’s barely anything left of her to compare to.” He orders sternly, and I push a strand of hair behind my ear. “And the only thing she can say she’s got on you, is screwing your husband, and she brags about it because strung out Nikki Sixx is obviously a prize.” He sarcastically states and I smile a little. “He didn’t cheat because you weren’t enough, Viv. He cheated because he’s fucking stupid and the drugs just add to it. I assure you, if you were ugly or something, none of us would wanna fuck you. But we do.”

“Gee, thanks, Izzy.” I flatly say, furrowing my brows slightly, and he nudges me with his elbow.

“You’re a seventeen.” He reassures me, smiling.

“See, this is what I would’ve appreciated hearing the other night.” I inform him.

“I was an ass the other night.” He admits. “I’m sorry for yelling at you...and there’s nothing wrong with you not picking up on our hints that something was wrong. You just see the best in people sometimes when they’re fucking shitty, is all.”

“Trust me I’ve learned my lesson.” I scoff.

“No, don’t let this bullshit ruin a good thing. You can still see the good in people and try to be positive about them, just use a little discernment from now on.” He shrugs and I wipe my eyes as he takes another drag of his cigarette.

“Did we just have a moment, Izzy?” I ask, and he furrows his brows and looks at me.

“No.”

“I think we did.”

“No, we didn’t.”

“I think we did. I think we just got a little closer in our friendship.”

“Nope, I don’t think so.”

“We did.”

“We didn’t.”

“I love you and I’m glad we’re friends.”

He just looks at me, trying not to smile, before getting a serious look on his face.

“It’ll be okay, Viv.” He assures me, genuinely, and I nod.

“I know it will be, I’m just kinda scared to go through the hell I’m gonna need to go through in order to get to the ‘it’s okay now’ part.”

“I know you are.” He tells me, exhaling more smoke. “I know you are.” 

That’s the thing about Izzy: a raging jackass when he wants to be, and quiet for the most part, but when he gets serious about something, it’s genuine and hard to ever forget.

Once Izzy decides to go home, I’m staring at the letter from Playboy, eyeing the number left at the bottom of the page for their project manager.

“Just call and see what they say.” I tell myself, taking a deep breath, my palms starting to sweat.

I dial the number and it rings a few times before someone picks up.

“Playboy Enterprises, this is Erika.”

I convince myself to calm down and ease the nerves bunching in my stomach before I reply.

“Y-Yes, this is Vivian Sixx. I got a letter from you guys?”

“Yes, they’ve been hoping you would call. Give me a moment and I’ll transfer your call to our PM.” She tells me.

“Okay, thank you.”

I wait for a moment as the line cuts out, before it cuts back in again.

“Mrs. Sixx?” Another woman’s voice greets me.

“Yes?”

“This is Danielle Wyther, I’m the one that sent you the letter.” She explains.

“Oh.”

“I take it you’ve made your decision.” She says next and I let out a little sigh, hesitantly giving an answer.

“I’m not comfortable doing full nudity--I mean, I don’t have an issue being nude but, like, I want the important parts covered.” I’m saying before I can stop myself, and I furrow my brows and mouth “what the fuck” to myself for being so blunt.

“...We didn’t expect anything different from you, Vivian, no worries.” She tells me and I let out a relieved breath. “We’ve already prepared for more tasteful photos.”

She goes on to tell me when I need to meet with her to sign my contract of payment and a temporary NDA ensuring I won’t let it out to the public I’m posing until they decide to announce it themselves, and then we go over when I need to come to Chicago to shoot.

Once a date is set to meet, and for the photoshoot itself, we hang up and I turn around to see Karen holding a cup of coffee, wearing her bedroom shoes due to the glass on the floor that I need to clean up.

“You didn’t hear that.” I tell her.

“I have no clue what you’re talking about.” She replies, obviously knowing what I’m talking about, but clearly not in a hurry to tell Nikki about it.

She just raises her brows and takes a sip of her coffee, minding her own business. 

After breakfast, I try to clean up the best I can, not even necessarily wanting to go to my room to grab a change of clothes and shower once I'm done, but I do. 

I'll just leave our room a shitshow for him since we're coming back for a five day break in like a week anyway. 

I shower and change clothes, grabbing my car keys.

"Where are you going?" Karen asks me.

"To see Sharise and Sky, and then I’m going out with the guys before I get home.” I tell her.

“Alright, be careful.”

“I will.”

I knew Karen wouldn’t say a thing to Nikki about Playboy, and she honestly never said a thing to me about it...but I could tell she didn’t necessarily agree with my decision, because nobody really agreed with it, they tolerated it.

In all honesty they all thought I had lost my mind, finally, because I was Vivian. Goody-goody, Christianly, worst-thing-ever-done-was-marry-someone-my-mother-didn’t-approve-of, Saint Vivian.

“Yes, I’m sure about it, Sharise.” I tell her, Skylar sticking a unicorn sticker to my face, making me smile at her as Sharise raises her brows at me.

“But you’ll be n-a-k-e-d.” She spells out so Skylar won’t catch on. “A-s-s and b-o-o-b-s out. For everyone to see.”

“Not really, everything’s gonna be covered.”

“Barely.”

“But still covered, nonetheless.” I argue.

“Do you want me to go with you?” She asks next.

“I wanna go!” Skylar says, looking at her mom, not even knowing where exactly we’re going, but wanting to tag along.

“No, I’ll probably have Duff or Steven go with me.” She tell her and she raises her brows.

“Oh...Duff...okay…”

“What?” I ask, furrowing my brows a little and she holds back a tight-lipped smile, shaking her head and shrugging.

“Nothing, Viv. Nothing at all. It’s just...you know…”

“...What exactly do I know?” I question.

“You know what you know.” She says back, matter-of-fact, and I think a moment before scoffing out.

“Oh, puh-lease, Sharise.” I hold back a bark of laughter.

“You know where I’m getting that idea, too.” She states and I shake my head.

“You are crazy.”

“Am I? You’ve just recently been hurt, you’re vulnerable, you’re confused, he’s available and attractive, and a complete gentleman--”

“--Which is exactly why nothing is happening because he’s not going to take advantage of me right now.” I tell her.

“Right now?” She widens her eyes and I sigh. “Ah, so you admit something’s cooking, it’s just not being served at the table at the moment.”

“It’s being poured down the drain because he’s got his own thing and I’ve got mine and neither of us are like that with each other.”

“He broke up with his ‘thing’ earlier this year and yours was just caught with a crack pipe in one hand, a needle in the other, and another woman’s mouth on his d-i-c-k, which sounds like a justified divorce to me.” She says to me, picking Sky up, and I let out a breath...because she’s right.

“Look, just think before you jump into the deep end. Just because there’s room for you to land, doesn’t mean there aren’t sharks waiting for you to dive in.” She warns me and I just nod slowly, rubbing my lips together.

I stay at Sharise’s for a couple more hours, before I’m meeting Duff at the Whisky because they’re playing a show tonight.

“Thank you.” I say as a girl in the crowded room moves for me to squeeze by her to get backstage with the guys once the show is over.

I crack open the door, seeing Axl in his assless chaps, his hair going all kinds of directions in it’s teased glory, and he smiles widely at me.

“Hey, Viv.” He greets me, and I step in to see everybody else in the room: Slash, Izzy, Stevie, Duff, and...no, no, that’s impossible.

I furrow my brows, my heart stopping in my chest.

“D-Dad?” I ask.

He’s just as shell shocked as I am, until his face is lighting up, tears coming to his eyes, as he nervously steps to me.

“What’re you doing here?” I ask next, realizing I’m about to cry.

I haven’t seen him in four years. We’ve written to each other every once in a while just to check up, but I haven’t seen him or heard his voice in four years.

“I’ve been coming down this part of town the past few nights when I heard you were back home.” He explains to me.

“Why?”

He doesn’t have to answer this, I know why. He heard his daughter’s husband possibly cheated on with her, and the mistress announced it on national television.

“Well, I couldn't really comfort you through a stupid letter.” He says and a tear rolls down my cheek.

“Aww, Dad." My voice cracks and he gives me a big hug.

"And I'll fly to wherever he is and give him a piece of my mind,  just say 'when' and I'll give him a real reason to go crawling to another woman." He states and I laugh, pulling away to wipe my eyes, getting a good, up close look at my dad. 

His hair is already starting to grey, despite only being forty-one, and his brown eyes haven't lost any of their spark that's been in them even since I could remember. 

He wipes my tears, giving me a reassuring smile. 

"I'm okay, Dad." I tell him, sniffling, looking around at the guys before looking back up at him. "How do you even know them?"

Apparently, several months prior, my dad happened to be in the same convenience store as Steven, who he saw was trying to smuggle a bag of Cheetos up his shirt because he couldn’t afford to buy them so my dad gave him a few hundred bucks and when he told Steven his name Stevie remembered my maiden name was “Kinston” and asked my dad if he knew me. It went from there and resulted in my dad checking in on them from time to time, but none of them ever told me because they weren’t ever really sure how I felt about my dad.

After the guys get changed, we’re heading to get some food  at the Rainbow with my dad tagging along.

“After she watched the Wizard of Oz with her aunt, she’d pretend she was the Good Witch of the South and used to get out of her little bubble baths and run through the house, calling herself the ‘Bubble Fairy’, with her mom chasing after her.” My dad tells the guys and I squeeze my eyes shut, wishing he wouldn’t have told the story of the notorious “Bubble Fairy.”

“Dad, they didn’t need to know that.” I say to him, seeing Duff and Slash trying to hide their laughter.

“Oh, it’s not that bad, Viv, you were a toddler.” My dad insists. “It was precious.”

“Yeah, maybe you should recreate it and let us see if it’s just as precious.” Izzy says to aggravate me.

“Hey, watch it.” My dad scolds him and I smile smugly at Izzy.

“Yeah, watch it." I echo and Izzy narrows his eyes at me.

"Whatever you say, Bubble Fairy." He says to me and I'm kicking at him under the table, before I'm looking at my dad again, taking a sip of Pepsi.

"Change of subject, why didn't you just come by the house?" I ask my dad.

"I didn't know if you would've wanted me to, if you were still trying to handle everything." He adds. "I was going to when I heard you had a health scare, but I didn't want to overstep any boundaries."

"Dad, I wouldn't have minded." I assure him, shaking my head a little. 

"Well, how much longer are you going to be in town?" He asks.

"Um, I'm flying out tomorrow for about a week, but we're supposed to be coming back home for a break." I explain. 

"'We're'? He's coming back home with you…is he staying with you?" He questions and I blink a couple times. 

"Well, y-yeah, we're still married, dad, so we're gonna be staying in the same house." I explain. "Especially since his manager thinks it's best if we play it off to the public and the media that the situation was a misunderstanding." 

"How the hell does one 'misunderstand' being engaged to a married man?" He asks, and the guys raise their brows.

"Well--"

"--I'd rip his manager a new one and tell him to use it to let out all the extra shit he's full of." 

My eyes widen, and I'm shocked, because I've never heard my dad this angry. 

"Dad, it's okay. After the tour if we want to file for divorce, we will."

"When is the tour over?"

"Next spring."

"Vivian, do you have any idea how long divorce takes to be finalized?" He asks and I rub my lips together. "If you genuinely want to get divorced, I suggest filing now so you can almost be done with it by the time the tour ends." 

"We've tried. She won't listen." Axl states, lighting a cigarette and I glare at him. 

"I'm weighing my options, dad." I say.

"And what's he doing?" He asks next. 

"Shooting heroin and screwing groupies." Axl interjects again.

"Axl." I snap. 

"Dude, c'mon." Duff lightly says, not amused with his suggestion. 

"What?" Axl looks at us. "Coming from a dude, infidelity is like cockroaches. For every one you know about, there's a hundred more you don't know about." 

"Dude!" Stevie scolds him, looking at him like he's lost his mind. 

"So we're just gonna pretend there's no chance that Vanity isn't the first chick Nikki's been with in the six years they've been together?" Axl keeps going. 

"I'm going to the bathroom." I mumble, getting out of the booth, trying not to think about the possibility of Nikki cheating with multiple other girls, but knowing it isn't too far-fetched to consider it.

After a couple minutes of wiping tears in the bathroom stall, I hear the door open, and wait to hear the clicking of heels on the tile floor, but instead hear heavy footsteps.

“Viv?” Duff asks and I let out a relieved sigh, sniffling.

“I’m fine.” I say to him, despite it not sounding convincing in the slightest.

“No, you’re not.” He tells me and I roll my eyes, opening the stall, looking up at him.

“I am.”

“There’s no fucking cameras around, you know that right?” He raises his brows and I exhale softly, throwing my wet, snotty tissue in the garbage can, stepping to the mirror to fix my face the best I can.

“I’ve thought of the possibility of him having others.” I admit, wiping the running mascara from my face as he leans against the stall’s fixture and looks at me in the mirror. “I’ve thought about it, and it’s one of my worst fucking fears is hearing this whole time there’s been girls left and right that’s he’s managed to sneak past me. I don’t like it, but I have thought about it. I’m not oblivious to that possibility.”

“I know you aren’t.” He nods.

“But he’s all I’ve known.” I tell him, taking a deep breath. “He’s all I’ve known and he’s all I’ve got and if I look for any more trouble, I’m gonna find it, and I’d rather not repeat this cycle of feeling like the biggest fucking idiot, so if we can just skip the conversation altogether I’d be really appreciative of it.” I state, turning to face him.

“Got it.” He promises. “And Axl doesn’t mean anything by it, Viv, alright? He just misses the mark when it comes to communication.” He shrugs. 

“I suppose.” I sigh out. “I’m sorry, you’re probably tired of me crying.”

“I wish you wouldn’t cry because I don’t like to see it, but I think you have every reason to, right now. I’m just happy you’re not completely losing your shit like I expected you to.” He explains and I raise my brows.

“Define ‘losing your shit’.”

He looks at me with raised brows.

“What did you do?” He asks me, amused.

“It’s not really what I’ve done...more so what I’m going to do.”

“What’re you going to do?”

“...Playboy sent me a letter, offering $40,000 for a cover shoot and interview, and some pictures to go along with it.” I watch as his eyes widen, and he gets an uneasy look on his face.

“Viv, you aren’t, like, the Playboy type, though.” He points out, worriedly.

“Well, no, I’m not, and I know that and they know that, so when I called just decided to do ‘tasteful’ nude shots.”

“‘Tasteful’ by Vivian standards, or ‘tasteful’ by pornographic magazine standards?”

“Vivian standards. Naked, but none of the good stuff is showing.” I state.

“Oh, okay.” He laughs out, nervously. “Are you...sure about it?”

“Well, at first I did it for the money because if Nikki leaves me, I’m not gonna have a penny to my name--”

“--Vivian, if you need money and somewhere to stay if things go to shit, you can just ask me or one of the guys.” He offers, looking like the thought of me posing nude just for money, doesn���t sit right with him because he knows I wouldn’t do it unless I felt I had no other choice.

“You didn’t let me finish.” I tell him, smiling. “But then they said it’d be tasteful and I wouldn’t have to show everything, and now it sounds kinda fun.”

“And what does Nikki think of it?” He asks me an important question and I go to speak, but stop myself, exhaling.

“What Nikki doesn’t know, won’t hurt him.” Is all I can come up with.

“Uh, I think Nikki will know when he sees his wife on the cover of Playboy.” He argues.

“It’s not like I’m gonna be posed on the front with my tits and pussy out, spread eagle for the world to ogle at my anatomy.” I counter and he squeezes his eyes closed, shaking his head a little.

“I didn’t need to picture you like that, Viv.” He says and I feel my cheeks heat up in embarrassment.

“Oops, sorry.” I say, rubbing my lips together. “Hey, there is something I need to ask you, though.”

“Yeah?” He replies, looking at me.

“Tomorrow I’m going to their office here in town to sign the paperwork and stuff, and then I’m going to Chicago for the photoshoot, because conveniently enough, Motley Crue will be in Chicago for a few days, and I was wondering if you’d want to come with me.”

He laughs like it’s absurd.

“You are crazy.” He says, in disbelief.  “You are crazy.”

“Duff--”

“--If he finds out I was there with you, Viv, I just--you are crazy.”

“So, you’re not gonna go with me?” I ask him, scared he’s going to say “no” to avoid pissing Nikki off.

But he completely surprises me when he says:

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

[lyrsui]

some of my friends are actually following my crafting page! I finally started browsing Pinterest for inspo content, and then sometime hopefully this week I'll get around to like... Making my own fun posts! I've made an Excel spreadsheet of post ideas, including things like ideas for my channel, stories, and main feed. I can't wait until the grid slowly starts to fill. I finally made my first post, and I'll share a second soon (I downloaded a preview app that helps me design my grid before uploading anything). I'm feeling a little more excited AND pretty soon I'm gonna like... Open commissions, I think. And I'm gonna try really hard to work on some simplistic designs I could sell in Etsy.

I lost the ability to sell via my website without paying an extra fee, which really... Sucks. Not to say that I was making big sales that way... But at least having the option felt good.

[porcupine-girl]

I don’t often post previews like this? But all three of those ideas I posted last night, they’ve been festering and developing in my head for a while now, and I’m just like... so eager to show them to people and talk to people about them, even if it’ll be a while before any of them are fully written. So I’ll probably be doing this more in the next few weeks. :)

Anyhow, I wound up mostly writing on the baby AU last night (Jack got Camilla pregnant, is going to raise the baby himself, Bitty goes to Providence for the summer to be his nanny). Keep in mind this is an almost-totally-unedited first draft, almost certain to change! (about 1400 words under the cut)

Eric was surprised to see Camilla Collins coming down the stairs when he got home from his afternoon class. They traded polite hellos as they passed each other, Camilla's smile looking a bit strained.

He knew she and Jack dated for a bit last year, but Jack hadn't really said a word about her since, and Eric hadn't seen her around. Were they back together? If they were, she hadn't looked terribly happy about it.

When he got to his room, he saw that Jack's door was open. Jack was sitting on his bed, looking dazed.

Eric poked his head in. "You okay, Jack?"

Jack looked up, but looked right through Eric as he sat there blinking for a moment. Finally, he shook his head as thought to clear it.

"I… I don't know."

That was not the response Eric had been expecting. He frowned and stepped into the room, closing the door behind him and dropping his bag next to it.

"What's going on? Did Camilla… break up with you or something?"

"What?" Jack's brow furrowed a little, but he still seemed mostly out of it. His voice was somewhat faint as he said, "We're not dating."

"Oh, right," Eric said, shoving his hands in his pockets. "I mean, I didn't think you were, but I don't know, I figured maybe I'm just out of the loop."

Jack looked down at his hands. "We… hooked up. Once. I mean, yeah, we dated for a bit last year, but that was a while ago. We hooked up once this school year, back in September. I hadn't even talked to her since then."

"Okay," Eric said slowly. He wasn't sure he really needed that information, but it felt like Jack was working up to whatever it was that had him so… maybe not quite upset, but in shock?

"She's pregnant."

Eric's eyes widened. He dropped onto the bed next to Jack, who leaned into him a little, like he was relieved to have someone there. "Oh. Oh, gosh. And it's…"

Jack shrugged. "She says she hasn't been with anyone else since then. No reason for her to lie."

"Is she…" Eric wasn't quite sure what he wanted to ask. "Does she… want to keep the baby?"

"Yes." Jack shook his head. "No. I mean—she's not having an abortion. But she wants to give it up for adoption."

Eric hated himself a little for being relieved. Relieved that Camilla didn't want to keep the baby herself, that it wouldn't be a reason for Jack to get back together with her. It was a terrible thing to think, not to mention totally useless since it's not like Eric had a chance either way.

"All she really wants from me is to go to the doctor's appointments with her," Jack continued. "Just for moral support. She doesn't even want me to pay for anything, she says her insurance will cover most of it and what it doesn't, the adopting parents will."

Eric nodded. "Well, that sounds. Y'know. Doable. But I get why you're…" He waved a hand up and down toward Jack. "In shock, I guess. Even if you don't have to do much, that's still kinda big, knowing a piece of you's gonna be out there livin' in the world somewhere."

"Yeah," Jack said quietly, frowning.

They sat there for a minute or two, Jack lost in his thoughts, Eric watching him.

"If you need anything," Eric finally said softly, "just to talk about it, or help with anything, or… or baked goods—" Jack didn't quite laugh, but he snorted and smiled, and that was good enough. "—you know I'm here for you, right? Anytime at all."

Jack nodded. "Thanks, Bittle. You won't tell anyone, right?"

"Good lord, of course not."

—

Finals came and went, Epikegster and Kent Parson came and went, winter break came and went.

Jack didn't mention the pregnancy again until one day in mid-January when he quietly slipped into Eric's room and shut the door behind him.

Eric looked up from where he was highlighting a textbook on his bed.

"What's up?"

Jack was a little pale. Eric hadn't seen him looking so shaken since… actually, he looked even worse than the day he found out that Camilla was pregnant.

Jack came right over to the bed and sat down next to Eric. He stared down at his hands long enough that Eric started to worry.

"Jack?" he finally asked. "What's going on?"

"What if she's like me?" Jack said, his voice nearly a whisper.

"She?"

"The baby. She's a girl." He finally looked up into Eric's eyes. "I went with Camilla to the doctor today, and they did the ultrasound. It's not… theoretical anymore, it's not just this abstract idea, that I got someone pregnant. She's got arms and legs and she was wiggling around. And what if…" His eyes shifted down again, to where he was twisting his fingers in his lap. "What if she's like me, what if she has an anxiety disorder or some other mental illness, and her parents don't know how to deal with it? What if they're in denial like mine were, and she just hurts worse and worse until she breaks?"

"Oh, honey," Eric said softly, touching Jack's arm. "That's a lotta what ifs, you know. She might not inherit any of that, and even if she does, I'm sure her parents will get her help. They'll have all the information about you, right? Your medical history? They'll know what to look out for."

"Or what if—" Jack cut himself off, and Eric realized suddenly that he was trying not to cry. Eric leaned his head on Jack's shoulder, and to his surprise, Jack leaned his head on Eric's.

"What if," Jack tried again after swallowing down whatever tears had been threatening him, "they see that I'm her biological father, and that I'm in the NHL, and they expect that from her? I mean, obviously not the NHL but something at that level? It was hard enough growing up in the shadow of my dad when I was surrounded by people who knew what it was like, what if she has parents who push her and have these expectations for her and they've never even felt that pressure themselves so they don't even know how to help her handle it as much as my parents did? You know what happened to me; if she has my talent but also my problems, and parents who push her and don't get her the help she needs—" Jack drew in a shuddering breath. "If she's going to be born, I don't want her to suffer like that."

Eric waited a few moments before speaking, wanting to make sure Jack had said everything he wanted to get out.

"Will Camilla let you help pick out her parents?" he finally asked. "You'd get to talk to them, right? You could ask them how they'd handle all of that."

Jack took a deep breath, then nodded. "I could—yeah, I should maybe talk to her about that. Sometime when I'm… not freaking out about it. But even then, they could say anything right now to sound good—I mean, think about it. They're gonna want to give the right answers to get us to choose them, right? Obviously the right answer is no, of course we won't pressure our daughter into anything just because she's good at something. They might even believe it right now. But fifteen years from now, how do I know they're going to follow through on that? Or that they'll even know how to? If she's really good at—well, any sport, really—something, and is pushing herself, and making it to the top levels, will they even have any idea how to balance supporting her pursuing it with not pushing her?"

"That sounds like something any parent would struggle with," Eric said carefully, lifting his head up to look at Jack. "I would hope they wouldn't lie about it just get a baby, though. I'm sure you'd be able to tell if they were."

"Maybe," Jack said, frowning down at his hands again. He finally glanced at Eric. "Sorry. I don't mean to dump all this on you, it's just… I haven't told anyone else yet."

"Oh, Jack, that is fine!" Eric said. "I told you you could come to me with anything at all, and I meant it! If there is absolutely anything I can do to help, please let me know, okay?"

Jack gave him a hint of a smile before standing up. "I will. I think I've got some thinking to do, but I'll let you know if I need a sounding board for it, okay?"

"Absolutely. Anytime, Jack, I'm serious."

[idiopathicsmile]

I'm Catholic but I've felt disillusioned with the Catholic Church for a while, and the Unitarian Church seems very interesting and I'd love to learn more about it, do you have any recommendations for someone who has anxiety and doesn't want to just go to one but would like more information?

Hey there, anxiety-buddy! Sure thing! I’m about to post an overview about Unitarian Universalism, but since you’re already curious, I assume you know some of the basics already and a lot of it might be overkill. So here, specifically, are some resources for checking out the Unitarian Church without just jumping in the deep end:

1. Honestly, you might wanna poke around the Unitarian Universalist Association website for a bit. You can get more background on where we came from, read an overview of your average UU worship service, check out some of the readings, and see if something connects. There’s also some adult education modules, which are designed to be done in a group, but can be a handy resource for exploring UU topics on your own.

The UUA is also on twitter and facebook, fyi.

2. Podcasts! There are a number of Unitarian Universalist podcasts. I’ve listened to Pamphlet and Fortification before. Pamphlet is interesting history-nerd stuff, but it can be a little in-jokey; I feel like it’s aimed at lifelong UUs like me. 

Fortification is really really good; it’s interviews with people doing progressive activist work, talking about how they got into it, what they’ve learned, and how they’ve sustained themselves emotionally and spiritually. It’s one of my favorite overall podcasts. Sometimes I complain about UUism feeling overly white, at least in the affluent WASPy suburbs where I’ve attended, but Fortification is refreshingly diverse in its guests.

3. If you wanna try out a sermon or two before attending a church in the meatspace, it may be worth mentioning that various churches around the country put out their sermons in podcast form. You could always browse, pick a sermon that looks interesting, make a cup of a relaxing warm beverage, light a candle, and give it a listen. (And if the first one doesn’t grab you, feel free to close out of it and try another from a different church; nobody’s gonna judge.)

4. Window-shopping

The congregation lookup tool lets you find the closest couple of congregations to you. (It’s maybe worth noting the tool lets you narrow your results to only congregations with wheelchair accessibility, and/or only congregations that have completed a program on LGBTQ+ inclusivity, which includes offering gender neutral bathrooms, etc.) 

You’ll be able to see how many members each congregation has (although keep in mind that from week to week, it’s probably a lot fewer butts in pews), and get a link to the churches’ individual websites. I’d recommend poking around on a specific church’s site, to see what kinds of service projects and social activities they do. Some sites also include sermon transcripts, if you want a preview of a specific minister.

Note: If the resources and the words fit for you but you’re still not at all comfortable attending a service, I think you are still within your rights to call yourself a UU if you want to. Spending your Sunday mornings away from church is a pretty Unitarian way to live. 

If you do decide to give it a shot, I just want to reassure you that we are largely a religion of converts. (It’s a little unusual, even in very liberal areas, for an adult like me to have been in the church since infancy.) So most people were brand-new to the whole thing at some point, and we all know it can feel awkward at first. There are designated greeters and usually a designated area for newcomers to hang out after the service if you want more information, but you are also within your rights to stay til the very end of worship and then bolt out the door--or bolt for a while and then stay once you’re comfortable. Our principles support all forms of diversity, including people with mental health issues.